Experiencing Kashi

The air is often filled with the chant “Namah Parvati Pateh — Har Har Mahadev,” echoing from both locals and visitors alike. There are places in the world that seem to hold something beyond the ordinary. They speak to the soul in a language that goes beyond words, a language of silence, energy, and deep spiritual resonance. The city known as Banaras, Kashi, or Varanasi. Its very air seems thick with centuries of history, devotion, and transformation. I’ve always heard that a visit to Kashi changes people—but I never quite understood what that meant. Until I stood in the shadow of the Kashi Vishwanath Temple gazing upon the sacred river Ganga and allowing the weight of it all to wash over me.

The city itself is a contradiction. On one hand, it is ancient, a place where the cycle of life and death has danced uninterrupted for thousands of years. The ghats, the temples, the narrow alleyways, the smoke from funeral pyres rising into the sky. It all speaks of impermanence, of a world where nothing stays the same. On the other hand, there is something incredibly present here, something that makes you stop and pause, to question your own life and your own journey.

I arrived at Kashi not expecting much. I had read about it, heard about it, but never thought it would change so much in me. The Kashi Vishwanath Temple—dedicated to Lord Shiva—sits at the heart of this spiritual chaos. The temple complex is narrow, the streets leading up to it bustling with life, vendors selling flowers, incense, and small offerings. The air is thick with the scent of marigolds, sandalwood, and something deeper—something that feels like devotion itself. As I approached the temple, I could feel a sense of calm. It wasn’t the crowds or the noise; it was the palpable sense of sacredness that enveloped the entire area.

When I finally entered the temple, the energy was undeniable. There was something grounding about it, something calming. The priests, the devout, the incense curling upward— all of it seemed to exist in harmony, a reminder that there is always more to the world than what we see with our eyes. As I touched the idol of Lord Vishwanath. I felt my mind quieting, the swirl of thoughts that normally raced through me fading into the background. Don’t know how to describe it, but in that moment, I felt at ease so much so that I hadn’t felt ever. I have the strenghth to just be without getting affected. They say the linga is like a baby there, and a friend helped to get a most closet darshan and easiet darshan amidst being over crowded.

They say Kashi should be seen with the minds eye. Its spirituality felt rather than seen.When I finally entered the temple, the energy was undeniable. There was something grounding about it, something calming. The priests, the devout, the incense curling upward—all of it seemed to exist in harmony, a reminder that there is always more to the world than what we see with our eyes. As I touched the idol of Lord Vishwanath, I felt my mind quieting, the swirl of thoughts that normally raced through me fading into the background. I don’t know how to describe it, but in that moment, I felt at ease so much so that I hadn’t felt ever.

Standing there, before the temple’s golden spire, I realized that letting go wasn’t about forcing myself to forget or suppress. It wasn’t about trying to “fix” the broken parts of me. It was simply about surrender. Surrendering to the flow of life, surrendering to the fact that I am not in control, that nothing truly belongs to me. Also Kabir was found by his foster parents on the banks of a lake nearby, and he lived and compiled most of his work there. I regretted not having visited the Kabir Chaura – the memorial Math and global headquarters of the Kabir sect – just 3 km from Varanasi.

Kashi has this magical way of making you see your own limitations. We live our lives clinging to things—material possessions, people, expectations, fears. But in Kashi, it’s impossible to ignore the truth that everything is fleeting. The river Ganga, which runs through the city, is a living testament to this. On its banks, people come to wash away their sins, to cremate their loved ones, to seek blessings for a better future. The flow of the river never stops, never hesitates. It just moves, onward, carrying everything in its path. Dying in Kashi – poised as it is believed to be on the tip of Shiva’s trident, and hidden from time and Yama (the dark God of death) – is said to grant one eternal salvation and a release from the cycle of death and rebirth.

We went on a boat rides by the river, watching the water flow, feeling the wind on my face. In that moment, I realized something profound: letting go is not about forgetting or erasing. It’s about allowing ourselves to be present in the now, to embrace the impermanence of life. And to trust that, just like the river, we too will continue moving, evolving, and growing. Something changed in me that day. I felt a release, a softening of the heart. There was a quiet in my soul, a stillness that had eluded me before. I knew that this was not the end of my journey, but a turning point. Kashi had opened a door in my heart, and though I didn’t have all the answers, I felt more at peace with the questions.

The boat owner said something that stayed with me-
Our city is this; Rand, Sand, Seedi, Sanyaasi… inse bacche to sevai Kashi.
“Widows, bulls, stairs, saints… escape from these and you reach Kashi”.
Widows are holy sisters but can steal a man’s virtue. Bulls are Shiv’s pet but can gore you in the streets. Stairs lead down to Ganga Mai but they can make you slip & crack your head. Saints… the trickiest of the bunch… they steal all your money and don’t offer good puja!
This is Banaras… externally holy and not holy. Internally pure.

Letting go is a gentle release, like the river flowing effortlessly around obstacles, carving its path without resistance. I may not fully understand everything Kashi has shown me, but I feel its wisdom deep within me. Life is about you have to let go—and in doing so, you find a peace that no struggle can take away. And no material possesion will

If you ever find yourself in Kashi, I encourage you to stop, listen, and surrender. You might find that what you’re searching for is already inside you, waiting to be uncovered. Just let go, and let the river of life carry you where you need to go.